Day 102 - A Year of Spiritual Awakening - As We Have Discussed

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Lesson 102: As We Have Discussed...

We may find it easier to hold compassion for others. I actually think compassion for others is easier than holding for compassion for me. In this lesson it’s mentioned that people see themselves as not “worthy” of compassion of their self. But what really makes us different from the next person? Nothing really…. We are all beings that can hold compassion towards others and ourselves. It shouldn’t be different from one person to the next. So why is it difficult?

The lesson today is to think about all our good deeds. We are to think about the good deeds outweighing the bad deeds. If we think in this way, do you find it is easier to hold compassion for yourself? I guess by seeing all the good you do, and thinking that it trumps the bad, it’s easier to look at ourselves and tell our self it’s okay.

What if we reversed it and the bad outweighed the good? Can you hold compassion then? We should be able to do this because it shouldn’t be any different. The idea for today is that god and bad doesn’t really exist when it comes to compassion and that of which we direct towards ourselves.

For me, I think I’ve focused so heavily on the bad, well I’ll say negative things that have happened to me, and sometimes it’s truly hard to get past. I think I am a good, decent person who tries to live by my words, but I tend to weigh myself down with the bad shit that’s happened. I do have to tell myself that yes, it happened but there’s nothing I can change from it. Learn from it and grow. I think when I remind myself of those good times, it’s easier to hold compassion during those tough times. I am just like anyone else who gives things a try but they may not always work out. It’s just a constant reminder we need to hold for ourselves and then this makes compassion for self easier.

Day 102 - A Year to Clear - Float Above This Difficult World

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Lesson 102: Float Above This Difficult World

“Still, what I want in my life is to be willing to be dazzled - to cast aside the weight of facts and maybe even to float a little above this difficult world. I want to believe I am looking into the white fire of a great mystery. I want to believe that the imperfections are nothing - that the light is everything - that it is more than the sum of each flawed blossom rising and fading. And I do.”

— Mary Oliver, House of Light

Took me a few times to read that quote and take some understanding from it. When I read it, I get this feeling that it’s about letting go. Let everything just fade away and go with the flow. So you made a mistake, so you have a bit of mess – whatever it is, just cast aside the weight of your thoughts and don’t be so hard on yourself. We thrive through our imperfections and are growing each and every day, sometimes in ways we don’t recognise. The light can absorb all your negativity if you want it to. You can live in a world of wonder and awe, if you don’t bog yourself down with all the weight that you create. Definitely learn from the lesson, though you have the power to let it go and let some positive light in.

Today’s exercise is about thinking of something that you are “ready to cast aside today”. To open ourselves up to let through even a little bit of light. When I think about something to cast aside it’s my negative thoughts around having no one to lead me. What I mean by that is that I sometimes just have to figure it all out on my own and don’t receive the guidance I need in life. I don’t have role models I can go to. It seems like I am always a leader, in my own life and others, though I feel it’d be nice to have someone to lead me. It sounds like such a silly thought to have when I type it and say it out loud. I wish to cast this aside and trust the light is guiding me, and taking me to where I need to go. I think I’m shown my strength every day and I need to trust in the plan for me, even though I do not have a direct leader to go to. I just have to trust  in myself.