Day 24 - A Year of Spiritual Awakening - When You Were Small
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Photo by Jenn Evelyn-Ann on Unsplash
Lesson 24: When you were small...
Today’s lesson has me going to the past to remember what I loved as a child. Anything we dreamed of becoming as a child was to set us onto our soul path. I had to think of what I loved when I was 7, 10 and 13, then think about what I dreamed of becoming as well as how I wanted to live.
When I was quite young, I wanted to be a ballerina. I am not sure why but that was an interest. Unfortunately, I did not even take lessons due to my lack in confidence. Really sad when I think about it, as I didn’t really do any outside of school activities due to my lack in confidence. It’s something I am looking to fulfil as an adult because I think it’s never too late to live out your dreams. I will learn ballet soon and hope to fulfil all I dreamed of doing due to never trying it.
I believe when I was 10 I wanted to become a lawyer. I couldn’t tell you why, but I think I was copying someone else’s dream, and I didn’t know what being a lawyer actually meant. At this point in time, I really latched onto all the different influences around me and copied them a lot! I didn’t know who I was or what I wanted and this was the only way I could see myself fitting in. I think maybe I thought being a lawyer was some kind of prestigious job.
When I was 13, I am pretty sure I wanted to be a popstar. This was due to the influence of the Spice Girls. I thought being in the limelight would be so ideal! Just singing music and travelling the world whilst making money. I never took lessons, again to a lack in confidence but that didn’t stop me from enjoying singing. I think all those bubblegum pop music influences really set a good path for me to enjoy music. Something I didn’t do before.
I didn’t really have a dream as a teenager. I didn’t even really know what I wanted to do when I exited high school and went to university. I really lost a lot of confidence and had low esteem that I spent so much time feeling lost. I dreamed about being famous but didn’t actually do anything significant to warrant fame. I think I dreamed about being far away from my own situation. It was more fantasy that really something I actually did. Then, I met my then boyfriend and thought I would just be a mother and have a family because that’s something I wanted, thought that never happened.
And here we are now.. I’ve had to remember things along the way that has set me on the path I am now. I wanted to be a witch and work with the light when I was younger, though I never pursued it as my then boyfriend reminded me we were Catholic and we didn’t believe in that. So I stopped that part of me. I’m 33 now, remembered this and am now on my way. I know now that I want to be a writer as I enjoyed that as a child so one day (hopefully), I’ll write my book series. I want to explore the world and learn how other people live. I want to learn more languages so I can communicate with more people. I want to find more people like me on my spiritual path and really connect. I want to be more environmentally friendly and help people. This is all these things I have remembered and I hope as I go on, I remember more of what I am supposed to do for my future.