Day 75 - A Year to Clear - If This Object Could Talk

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Lesson 75: If This Object Could Talk

Today is all about being with the same object as yesterday and noticing if any feelings have changed. Is it easier to be with it or does the “weather” come back again. If the weather arises, try the exercise with another object that doesn’t stir up these responses.

I am to think about what the object would say to me if it could talk. I think it would say “Liana, why have you kept me around for so long. You don’t use me anymore and I am just sitting here not doing much. It’s time to move me on. All I am doing is collecting dust.” I imagine this to be most of those items that I have that I’m also 50/50 on. It’s time to be moving on.

Day 74 - A Year of Spiritual Awakening - With the Full Allowing...

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Lesson 74: With the Full Allowing...

We are powerful individuals. I just want to start out by saying that. We can do whatever we need to in order to get through our pain. Sometimes we think we won’t make it through but I believe it builds us to be stronger and helps us overcome situations we didn’t think we could.

Today is all about open ourselves up to a moderately painful memory and feel that emotion fully. It’s about the awareness of the pain which really opens us to that first passage of the heart. You will start to see how much you can bear it. Over time as more pain comes through various situations, you will start to realise that we can power through anything.

When I think of a painful memory, I think of a time my single mother was crying because she didn’t have enough money to feed my brother and I when we were younger. I remember her despair and how sad I felt. I remember all she could give us was baked beans on toast which really was enough. I think she was upset because she couldn’t give us a proper dinner. I remember my brother saying everything would be okay and to not worry. It still brings so much sadness to me thinking about that situation, that as a child, my brother was reassuring even through one of our lowest points. I don’t think my mum ate that night. Sometimes when I retell that story I break down into tears because I know how painful despair can be. Right now, I say share it without tears which says to me how much stronger I can be for it.

Day 74 - A Year to Clear - Be With Your Things

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Lesson 74: Be With Your Things

Today is all about sitting with your items that haven’t been used for a while and allow all the sensations to arise without judgement. If there is too much “weather”, stop the exercise and go do something that feels good instead. You can sit with as little or as many items as you want – a photograph, a ring your mother gave you, some clothes, stationary, but whatever it is, see what comes about.

I am sit sitting with some stationary. They sit in a bag and I am pretty sure they are from over 10 years ago. I used to like to write letters to friends or write in notebooks and adopt a lot of colourful pens. They made me feel happy at the time but now I don’t see any practicality to them. They are childish and I used to hold onto things because they were “mine”. I had this really obsessive way of owning my things and this continued into adulthood. I definitely want to give them away, but I haven’t had time really going through my clutter recently. I’ve pretty much tried clearing thoughts. I’m fairly neutral towards these items as they don’t serve me and they will go towards good use by some teenager out there when I donate them. Fairly simple exercise today.

Day 73 - A Year to Clear - Tune Into Things

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Lesson 73: Tune Into Things

Today is all about tuning into possessions that you hold. Does thinking about them or holding them just don’t have the same feeling you once had towards it. This can be anything from a ring your mother gave you, maybe a photo with old friends, that birthday present you got when you were 18. Whatever it is, you will feel some good feelings or maybe some discomfort.

Today I am to tune into a physical item and see how it makes me feel without judging whether it’s good or bad.

I know I have some items from my ex that I still have but not on display. I am still contending whether it’s worth keeping for the memory or not, or do I just let the past die. I like looking at this canvas he made me with some fun memories we had on it together. I feel good towards how I felt in those moments, but then looking at him, I obviously have ill feelings towards him. In regards to the item itself, I don’t really judge it as good nor bad. It’s why I find it hard to get rid of as it’s kind of neutral. I don’t place it on display and I never would again, so I’m not sure if keeping it actually is worth it? I guess I keep it around because it was heartfelt at the time and that’s always a good thing but the question still remains of, should I really keep it though?

Day 73 - A Year of Spiritual Awakening - Fear and Joy

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Lesson 73: We All Will Have Fear and Joy...

Everything we experience go through cycles. We love and we hurt, we feel joy and feel pain. We truly find that we awaken when we can open ourselves to the first passage of the heart which is pain and raise our consciousness towards it.

Today is all about how we can become whole as we become more awake. If you aren’t awakened, why do you think that is? If you are think about how you did it.

I feel like a broken record but I truly felt awakened when I was angrily asking the Universe what the point of everything was when I just had an abortion. I think that was my lowest point and when I got answered by the Universe as it sent two angel fish my way, I knew there was something bigger than me and my life really changed. I have been working through my pain ever since. Not just in relation to that abortion but all past memories, toxic relationships, habits and trauma. It’s still a working progress. I don’t think I am whole yet but I am certainly on my way. I think when you can recognise your pain and actually become aware that you need to work through it, that’s when you really open yourself. Yes, it can definitely be a tough ride as you face some truths but it’s worth it for overall sense of wellbeing. I feel like when I can conquer even my lowest of lows, it shows that I can do just about anything!