Day 104 - A Year of Spiritual Awakening - This Idea of Unworthiness

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Lesson 104: This Idea of Unworthiness...

“This idea of unworthiness, of sin, of being unsalvageable—it’s not true! You took on this idea, when you first were hurt, wounded, experienced pain. But it’s a misbelief. You don’t need it. This idea isn’t correct!”

— Sara Wiseman

Today we are to write down all the “rotten” things about ourselves. We are to read it and recognise that we are just like anyone else – there is nothing more wrong or right about you to the next person. We are all imperfectly perfect. It’s time to acknowledge that we are very much the same in this way. We all have good and bad aspects and go through the same emotions and feelings. Our experiences in situations are not the same but we definitely can say we know of anger, pain, hurt, love, happiness, joy….

My list consists of:

·         I am messy

·         I don’t like my body sometimes

·         I don’t eat well enough

·         I can be lazy

·         I need more focus and motivation

·         I should be doing more for myself

That’s my immediate thoughts of things I recognise I do consistently. I guess the point is, I share these same thoughts with many people… and that’s okay! These are attributes I am trying to work on and I actively seek out to eradicate the bad thoughts and take action of those that I lack. I don’t necessarily see myself as “rotten”. I just think it’s a step by step process, always getting closer to the best version of me.

Day 104 - A Year to Clear - What Would You Do?

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Lesson 104: What Would You Do?

We are posed with a simple question today “What would you do if you felt 100 percent worthy?”. Contemplate and write about your experience.

For me, it’s still something I work on – that I am worthy of whatever I want as long as I work for it. I do not think that I am in anyway entitled to anything nor do I like to use the term “I deserve it”. Personally, I struggle with those thoughts that put myself down which I believe many people do. Thoughts such as “why would anyone be interested in me, the way I look right now” “why isn’t anything going my way” “why doesn’t anything good happen to me” – they are very much limiting thoughts. I am self-aware of those thoughts and I actively work in changing my mindset. I am around people that teach me a better way. to get up in the morning and look yourself in the mirror and say positive things such as “I am beautiful” “I look good today” “My outfit looks great” and you keep repeating positive affirmations until you actually start to believe it. It’s when you start to believe it that others will too.

I think when you work on yourself, then the thought of worth would naturally come into play. It’s not that you aren’t worthy now; it’s that your mindset has to catch up. I know I am worthy of so much, though it’s about having the thought processes that accompany it and I know I will get there.

Day 103 - A Year of Spirituality - Cracking Open

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Lesson 103: This Cracking Open Into the Heart of Compassion...

Today is all about holding compassion for yourself for 5 minutes. I think everyone can do this. Think about a mistake you made or if you had a bad thought and just hold compassion. Doesn’t take long. Everyone has 5 minutes right? Don’t consider yourself unworthy but trust in the Divine. Let the healing come to you because you deserve it as much as the next person! Allow your heart to be open and let it in.

I decided to hold compassion for myself for some dumb weird thoughts I had. I think as humans we have some real messed up thoughts just based on our surroundings, conditioning and influences. Sometimes we need to challenge those thoughts really. Anyway, I imagine white light filling me. There is a hand on my shoulder indicating that it’s okay to mess up sometimes. And I just think about the light healing me so I can move forward.

How did you go with compassion for self?

Day 103 - A Year to Clear - Your Best Self

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Lesson 103: Your Best Self

“It’s simple. Your life is how you see it. No one can beat you at being you.”

— Joel Osteen

Today we are to write down all the words that describe our best self.  From there, focus attention to t for the day and without any apology.

My words:

·         Energetic

·         Unapologetic

·         Lively

·         Caring

·         Friendly

·         Nice

·         Patient

·         Loving

·         Adventurous

·         Fearless

·         Unworried

·         Empowered

·         Creative

·         Strong

·         Enriched

·         Enthusiastic

·         Fulfilled

There are probably a lot more words but then I feel they would be much of the same as the above. Today I will focus on being more energetic since I’ve felt drained 1 week ago. I was using a clear quartz crystal to do this for me this week and I felt good. I forgot to put it on today so I am on my own.

I will feed off the energy of the sun and just be my best self. It has actually made me wonder why we don’t just live the best versions of ourselves all the time. Maybe that is the lesson. Nothing stopping us from being all these things we want to be!

Day 102 - A Year of Spiritual Awakening - As We Have Discussed

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Lesson 102: As We Have Discussed...

We may find it easier to hold compassion for others. I actually think compassion for others is easier than holding for compassion for me. In this lesson it’s mentioned that people see themselves as not “worthy” of compassion of their self. But what really makes us different from the next person? Nothing really…. We are all beings that can hold compassion towards others and ourselves. It shouldn’t be different from one person to the next. So why is it difficult?

The lesson today is to think about all our good deeds. We are to think about the good deeds outweighing the bad deeds. If we think in this way, do you find it is easier to hold compassion for yourself? I guess by seeing all the good you do, and thinking that it trumps the bad, it’s easier to look at ourselves and tell our self it’s okay.

What if we reversed it and the bad outweighed the good? Can you hold compassion then? We should be able to do this because it shouldn’t be any different. The idea for today is that god and bad doesn’t really exist when it comes to compassion and that of which we direct towards ourselves.

For me, I think I’ve focused so heavily on the bad, well I’ll say negative things that have happened to me, and sometimes it’s truly hard to get past. I think I am a good, decent person who tries to live by my words, but I tend to weigh myself down with the bad shit that’s happened. I do have to tell myself that yes, it happened but there’s nothing I can change from it. Learn from it and grow. I think when I remind myself of those good times, it’s easier to hold compassion during those tough times. I am just like anyone else who gives things a try but they may not always work out. It’s just a constant reminder we need to hold for ourselves and then this makes compassion for self easier.